Friday, January 13, 2012

My nest

Freya has been kicking all day today! That's what Sam and I affectionately call our little one. No known gender yet, just assurance that it is healthy and growing! Why is it so popular now to find out what you're having? (Insert joke about "You're having a baby, haha!") I've never wanted to find out. I've always, and when I say always I mean from the time I started playing mommy with my dolls, wanted it to be a surprise. I feel that God made this the most exciting gift possible. He teases you with knowing you have a gift coming. Feeling the wondrous moves inside your belly. But not giving away, at least not naturally giving away the best part of all. Boy or girl. I've always found this fascinating. Why keep it a secret? Why not have some way of knowing? Some people think they can tell by how you're carrying, the pencil trick, or just having that innate knowledge some feel so deeply about. I'm not one of them. At least not about my own babe. I truly don't have a strong feeling. Right now I think it will be a girl more than a boy, but it's like a 60/40 feeling. No guarantees :)

Presently, Freya is transverse (according to our lovely midwife and my instincts). Which means that it's head is in the lower left part of my ever-stretching abdomen, and it's little feet are up towards my right ribs. Hopefully it is working it's way head down. The midwife, Michelle, didn't seem too concerned, but me being me, I have been praying and wondering about it since she told me that. The movements are so vivid now. I can feel the head/arms moving right against my skin sometimes. It is the most amazing experience I have ever had in my life. And I'm not saying that lightly. I've always wondered what that feeling would be like, and it far surpasses my ideas. The coolest part now is that Sam can hear the heartbeat with his ear against my belly! When he puts his head down to listen, the baby will often kick right where his cheek is resting. Talk about love.

I've gained approximately 17 pounds now. Weird. I never thought I would really care about my weight when I was pregnant, but oddly I kind of do. I logically know that it is fine and actually good. But I've never really gained weight in my life. Ever. Other than muscle when I was in high school and working out like crazy, so it was good weight. I see my body changing, weekly at least, which is also bizarre but beautiful. The best part is I get to share it all with my best friend, my hubby. He loves me, truly. And he has made it so acceptable and lovely to watch me change into a momma. It has brought even more of my walls down with him when I didn't think there were many, if any, left.

I have been blessed with an enjoyable pregnancy so far. For years, I wondered if I would be really sick. My mom was pretty sick with each of her three, and I kind of assumed I would be. I am so incredibly thankful for how it has gone so far. I was nauseous and dizzy from about week 6-9ish, and also ridiculously tired. The exhaustion could have also been because I started back to teaching again right around that time, which wears anybody out. I would work all day, come home and nap for an hour, and still go to bed around 9. It was an adjustment for us to say the least. Sam was so understanding and began to take over practically everything around the house. Including our brand new, 8 week old puppy, Willow. Life was changing very quickly.

Before I get too carried away, this post is entitled 'my nest' and I feel that I owe the appropriate explanation. God has been so gracious. Especially these past few months. I want to document His goodness and the story He is telling through us. My nest right now consists of three amazing, incredible, and very different creatures: Sammy, Freya, and Willow. We are on a journey. Together. I want to tell our story. Whether is it worth reading or not is up to you. It is simply ours. Made by the One who makes.

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